am i ugly??? - THE CATASTROPHIZER
 
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This online kids' advice column is not simply noteworthy because of its jarring colour scheme and unorthodox choice of fonts. It also features a letter that features the word "retarded" without quotation marks.

I Like this boy but my friend called him and he said that im ugly!!! He also said that if he went out with me he would be retarded!!! what do i do????

1) I'm relieved to hear that you continue to use the present tense when discussing your liking of this boy. That suggests that in the future you will continue to feel affection for people even when they express their distaste and disdain for you in no uncertain terms. The fact that you are asking for advice indicates that you are inclined to try to change yourself, re-engineer yourself, rather than learn to judge accurately those who reject you. That's the kind of skill that will come in handy the rest of your life. 

2) I am concerned, though, by the fact that your self-doubt is not more explicit. Are you ugly? Why would going out with you make him "retarded"? Even if you aren't ugly or unpopular, entertaining suspicions that you are will help condition your negative intellectual impulse. These are the kind of catastrophizing opportunities you can't afford to squander. 

3) I'm also concerned by your exuberant use of quotation and exclamation marks because it speaks to a lack of self-consciousness. You should be more concerned about drawing attention to yourself, especially as you may already be ugly and unpopular.


Send the Catastrophizer your requests for advice and/or rationalizations using the form conveniently provided HERE. I will publish my responses on the THE CATASTROPHIZER page.

POLITE DISCLAIMER: This site is intended for entertainment purposes only. If you are not entertained, fair enough.



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