I'm not sure exactly who this Harlan Cohen is, but the fact that he contributed to Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul III certainly speaks to his credibility. Although he has appeared on Sally Jesse Raphael, which makes me think he is not, in fact, "one of the youngest syndicated columnists."

Dear Harlan,
I am a single 35-year-old woman who has not dated very much -- in large part, I believe, due to my shyness. I have had a few short-lived relationships but have never been in a long-term relationship. I am curious to know, from your perspective (as a guy), if men would see my lack of relationship experience at my age as a red flag.

Dateless and Doubtful

1) Never assume you know what other people find repulsive or off-putting about you. You hypothesize that it's your shyness that repels people, but it could just as easily be your looks.

2) Did you continue to be shy during these short-lived relationships? If not, what about the rest of your personality do you think cut these relationships short?

3) Men might not see your lack of relationship experience as troubling, but they might be concerned by the fact that you are extremely insecure and apparently inclined to look for advice and emotional support from online advice columnists. 

Send the Catastrophizer your requests for advice and/or rationalizations using the form conveniently provided HERE. I will publish my responses on the THE CATASTROPHIZER page.

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